Parental Control

Parental Control

From a long time now, I have been finding a feature called ‘Parental Control’ on various social media platforms, websites and digital viewing channels.

What is this ‘Parental Control’?

Any guesses? Why guess? You know it right! Well according to our favorite Wikipedia, ‘Parental controls’ are features which may be included in digital television services, computer and video games, mobile devices and software that allow parents to restrict the access of content to their children.

These controls were created to assist parents in their ability to restrict certain content view able by their children. This may be because of the content they deem inappropriate for their age, maturity level or feel is aimed more at an adult audience. Which is undoubtedly true.

Parental controls fall into roughly four categories:

• Content Filters, which limit access to age inappropriate content.

• Usage Controls, which constrain the usage of these devices such as placing time-limits on usage or forbidding certain types of usage.

• Computer Usage Management Tools, which enforces the use of certain software.

• Monitoring, which can track location and activity when using the devices.

Now you are really going to yell at me saying that you know about this ‘already’. So, we feel that by applying these parental control measures on possibly every device, channel, computer, internet, game portals and other software; we have saved our children from exposure to explicit content. We are at peace by just thinking about it.

We now try to time the usage of every device found at home. So now you are more secured about the media exposure of your child and pride yourself for your ability to control.

Now here is a real life scene: Father-busy at work, Mother- busy in kitchen and the child / children – done with their homework, done with their play-time, getting bored and irritated, trying to grab your attention but to no success, now reach out for your mobile phone. Remember, that your attention is away from them!  Yes, so they grab your phone and start surfing through the device. And much to their dismay and more to your horror, they find their favorite prohibited content playing unrestricted on your phone. Children are hurt immediately, so they turn to question you. What is your answer or excuse to this?

I know, I know, that you are equipped with the best answer, ‘Kid, it’s not good for you.’

Then a question is retaliated back to you, by your kid, ‘Is it good enough for you to watch it?’

Again, your smartness comes to your rescue and you politely say, ‘I am older than you kid and I have seen through life’ and you gently take the phone back from your child.

An awkward silence hangs in the atmosphere! The child and the parents are on a thinking spree. The child is thinking, ‘What is it that I can’t see but is exciting enough for parents to see? Why all controls for me? I know everything so what’s new? What if I watch it once?’ The parents are thinking, ‘Now what? How do I handle this situation? If I change my device password, it will create a doubt in the child’s mind. Why should I be answerable to my kids? Why should I sacrifice my personal hobbies or interests now that I have grown old enough to see all this stuff and am settled in my career? Do I have to be answerable to my kids too?’

So, what should be done? What is the way out of this tricky situation?

Hey, Hey, Hey! It’s my turn to tell you something here. For a minute, just think about, what an example you are setting in front of your own children! Of a cool ‘Hypocrite’! Right! Accept it. It’s easier than thinking about all kinds of arguments that you want to throw at me.

‘Parental Control’ can and should apply to parents too if they want to see their kids growing up into truthful, sensible, mature humans. How do we do it? The answer is – with patience, by laying down some ground rules at home, implementing but first trying them out on yourself  by not shouting/ nagging/ negotiating with your kids, handling temper tantrums and the most important of all , with firmness, love and care. Ya – Ya  - Ya - BIG words of advice!

I know, it’s easily said than done. But seriously guys, we can at least give it a try with our heart, mind and soul, to let go of your desires for the sake of your children. And try to give them all your time and attention; talk to them about everything; share your memories with them while taking utmost care of not belittling/ demoralizing/demeaning them in any way; quench their thirst for knowledge and satisfy their curiosity with ‘as a matter of the fact’ answers and not some foolish answers.

Remember, these are millennial children and are smart enough to google whatever they want to know. It’s better if we become their ‘Google’ and ‘Wikipedia’.

Exercise ‘Parental Control’ both ways. Good Luck!

Kashmira Vaishnav🙂